Question:
I'm becoming a sex addict....HELP!!! CANNOT GO TO DOCTOR..can't tell family, plz help me?
2010-11-09 14:15:03 UTC
i'm 20 yr male,i begin by starting the net for some study related thingor just youtube, then open a tab for some porn site and then waste at least 2-3 hrs on the net ONLY looking for porn.....after i close the net, i feel extremely depressed and guilty...i cant stand it anymore but i can NOT see a doc cause that would be very embarrassing and i cant tell my family(plz DO NOT suggest me to SEE A DOC, I WUD IF I CUD)..
I CANT DO IT WITHOUT NET because it is needed constantly for study related purposes,so thats not an option.....
plzzz help me i know i NEED help i am wasting away my life!!!!!
Four answers:
2010-11-09 18:11:34 UTC
The best way to cure porn addiction is to involve yourself in something which keeps you active and something which helps to build your skills fruitfully. This could be achieved by:

*Doing some sport

*Join a local community service

*Read a descent book

*Join a job which would keep you occupied (but not one which makes you stressed)

*Meditate (not yoga exactly, but try sitting down, cross your legs, close your eyes and take a deep breath from your nose and let it slowly & calmly from your mouth)

*And one other key thing is to have good friends and avoid the bad set to make yourself a better person. What's more, try your best to spend little time on the computer.

*Delete all porn links, images, videos, etc on your computer.

*Try to use a porn filter software to block all porn websites and applications.
2016-12-04 15:42:51 UTC
it is loopy your mom needs to try this and very controlling. i'm additionally shocked the docs agreed to it at age 13 it is extremely atypical. No, they'd't tell. And something they locate out they'd't share together with your mom besides because of confidentiality agreements exceptionally while you're underage. confer with the wellness care expert approximately this. All they'd tell is that if your hymen is broken or no longer yet that rather would not instruct in case you have had intercourse or no longer because of fact there are multiple procedures wherein a woman's hymen can harm without her having intercourse. in fact pap smears can try this and that would have happened to you which of them is why it harm so badly. per danger in case you had intercourse and not employing a condom purely previously the examination and that they have been finding for strains of semen, they'd locate that, yet I doubt a physician would do such an invasive element on a minor for no reason (it might usually in elementary terms be interior the case of rape). Pap smears shouldn't harm too badly i'm sorry you had a bad journey. it is probably this one won't harm lots in case you have had intercourse.
Sam
2010-11-09 14:25:42 UTC
I believe sex addiction is a real problem that can be treated at home. I am a treated sex addict my self i was able to control my urges through a timer. Everyday i would give myself a half an hour to masturbate then once that was done i would distract my self with some thing else. another thing you can do is put up a internet site blocker which blocks porn sites.
♥♥ LOVE GURU ♥♥
2010-11-10 09:29:38 UTC
The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-IV) is used by both psychologists and psychiatrists for diagnosing disorders, such as substance dependence, which is essentially what addiction is. The DSM-IV offers seven criteria for substance dependence.



The seven criteria for substance dependence are:



(1) Tolerance, as defined by either of the following:



(a) A need for markedly increased amounts of the substance to achieve intoxication or desired effect.



(b) Markedly diminished effect with continued use of the same amount of the substance.



(2) Withdrawal, as manifested by either of the following: (a) The characteristic withdrawal syndrome for the substance (refer to Criteria A or B of the criteria sets for Withdrawal from specific substances). (b) The same (or a closely related) substance is taken to relieve or avoid withdrawal symptoms.



(3) The substance is often taken in larger amounts or over a longer period than was intended.



(4) There is a persistent desire or unsuccessful efforts to cut down or control substance use. (Unmanageable)



(5) A great deal of time is spent in activities necessary to obtain the substance (such as visiting multiple doctors or driving long distances), use the substance (such as chain smoking) or recover from its effects.



(6) Important social, occupational, or recreational activities are given up or reduced because of substance use.



(7) The substance use is continued despite knowledge of having a persistent or recurrent physical or psychological problem that is likely to have been caused or exacerbated by the substance.



Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous (SLAA) has created 40 questions for self diagnosis of Sex and Love addiction:



Have you ever tried to control how much sex to have or how often you would see someone?



Do you find yourself unable to stop seeing a specific person even though you know that seeing this person is destructive to you?



Do you feel that you don’t want anyone to know about your sexual or romantic activities? Do you feel you need to hide these activities from others—friends, family, co-workers, counselors, etc.?



Do you get “high” from sex and/or romance? Do you crash?



Have you had sex at inappropriate times, in inappropriate places, and/or with inappropriate people?



Do you make promises to yourself or make rules for yourself concerning your sexual or romantic behavior that you find you cannot follow?



Have you had or do you have sex with someone you don’t (didn’t) want to have sex with?



Do you believe that sex and/or a relationship will make your life bearable?



Have you ever felt that you had to have sex?



Do you believe that someone can “fix” you?



Do you keep a list, written or otherwise, of the number of partners you’ve had?



Do you feel desperation or uneasiness when you are away from your lover or sexual partner?



Have you lost count of the number of sexual partners you’ve had?



Do you feel desperate about your need for a lover, sexual fix, or future mate?



Have you or do you have sex regardless of the consequences (e.g. the threat of being caught, the risk of contracting herpes, gonorrhea, AIDS, etc.)?



Do you find that you have a pattern of repeating bad relationships?



Do you feel that your only (or major) value in a relationship is your ability to perform sexually, or provide an emotional fix?



Do you feel like a lifeless puppet unless there is someone around with whom you can flirt? Do you feel that you’re not “really alive” unless you are with your sexual/romantic partner?



Do you feel entitled to sex?



Do you find yourself in a relationship that you cannot leave?



Have you ever threatened your financial stability or standing in the community by pursuing a sexual partner?



Do you believe that the problems in your “love life” result from not having enough of, or the right kind of sex? Or from continuing to remain with the “wrong” person?



Have you ever had a serious relationship threatened or destroyed because of outside sexual activity?



Do you feel that life would have no meaning without a love relationship or without sex? Do you feel that you would have no identity if you were not someone’s lover?



Do you find yourself flirting or sexualizing with someone even if you do not mean to?



Does your sexual and/or romantic behavior affect your reputation?



Do you have sex and/or “relationships” to try to deal with, or escape from life’s problems?



Do you feel uncomfortable about your masturbation because of the frequency with which you masturbate, the fantasies you engage in, the props you use, and/or the places in which you do it?



Do you engage in the practice of voyeurism, exhibitionism, etc., in ways that bring discomfort and pain?



Do you find yourself needing greater and greater variety and energy in your sexual or romantic activities just to achieve an “acceptable” level of physical and emotional relief?



Do you need to have sex, or “fall in love” in order to feel like a “real man” or a “real woman”?



Do you feel that your sexual and romantic behavior is about as rewarding as hijacking a revolving door? Are you jaded?



Are you unable to concentrate on other areas of your life because of thoughts or feelings you are having about another person or about sex?



Do you find yourself obsessing about a specific person or sexual act even though these thoughts bring pain, craving or discomfort?



Have you ever wished you could stop or control your sexual and romantic activities for a given period of time? Have you ever wished you could be less emotionally dependent?



Do you find the pain in your life increasing no matter what you do? Are you afraid that deep down you are unacceptable?



Do you feel that you lack dignity and wholeness?



Do you feel that your sexual and/or romantic life affects your spiritual life in a negative way?



Do you feel that your life is unmanageable because of your sexual and/or romantic behavior or your excessive dependency needs?



Have you ever thought that there might be more you could do with your life if you were not so driven by sexual and romantic pursuits?



If you would like to get more information, or begin sex addiction recovery, you can choose from many different sources. SLAA, is the oldest of the sex addiction recovery programs. It is both free and anonymous. Those who lead these programs, are also addicts and can provide you with first-hand relatable experience, strength and hope.



SLAA - Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous

http://www.slaafws.org

http://slaaonline.org



SAA - Sex Addicts Anonymous

http://saa-recovery.org



SA - Sexaholics Anonymous

http://www.sa.org



SCA - Sexual Compulsives Anonymous

http://www.sca-recovery.org/



Co-SLAA - Recovery for family of Sex and Love Addicts

http://www.coslaa.org/



Best of luck in life and love. :-)


This content was originally posted on Y! Answers, a Q&A website that shut down in 2021.
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