Were you bullied as a child?

Question

For my school project i'm doing research on bullying. And to gain a little more insight on the subject i have a few questions i would like to have answered. For my project i need people who are studying or working so no highschool or primary school.

Because the subject of the project is "Do people who were bullied at highschool or primaryschool experience problems later in life when they're studying or working" (more like what are the effects on your personality) it sounds a little bit different in my language but this is kind of what it's about.

if you don't feel like anwering then of course you shouldn't

the questions:

How old were you when you where bullied for the first time?
For how long were you bullied? for how many years?

Do you think there was a reason you where bullied?
Were those the same things that made you insecure?

Did the bullying change your personality?
Are you still experiencing problems from bullying?(insecure, aggresive)

Does your social life suffer of you being bullied when you were a child?(problems making connections, don't trust people)
does you work or study suffer from you being bullied are you able to work or study normally?

If you have more information for me feel free to share, i'm just trying to get a little more insight.

Could you also tell me if you're male or female, your age and the country you live in this would be helpfull^^

Answer 1

How old were you when you where bullied for the first time?

You know what, I have no clue. I didn't even know it was not 'normal' back then so it's kinda hard for me to tell right now... I'd say about when I was 7 or 8?



For how long were you bullied? for how many years?

About 2 years. I transferred after that.



Do you think there was a reason you where bullied?

I was a socially deprived child who did not know the conventions of normal humans. I laughed when they laughed though I was the joke because some idiot adults told me that they won't be mean to you if you laugh it off.



Were those the same things that made you insecure?

Nope.



Did the bullying change your personality?

I don't know man, maybe I was always destined to be a sarcastic b*tch but some fancy psychologist will put it down as defensive mechanism...

For the love of human life itself, don't listen to that bullcr@p.



Are you still experiencing problems from bullying?(insecure, aggresive)

As I said, I will never know what I'd have turned out as if the 'bullying' never happened, just like other people may not know what would have happened if they were bullied. My disdain to humanity may be an in-born thing. But according to my parents, I was quite violent at one point (I don't remember, must have blocked out that memory for a good reason) and beat up two of the bullies, then smiled when they told the teacher.



I was like 8 then and I honestly didn't know that very action was called smiling. I was you know, loosening up my face muscles but then the kid pointed at me like 'SHE SMILED' and I was confused, so I went and did the same thing in front of a mirror later and found that I had a stunning smile.



And yes, I had homicidal fantasies for a while which I legit wrote stories on, but I'm not sure if those were effects of bullying because I wrote those 'stories' since I was 6...



Does your social life suffer of you being bullied when you were a child?(problems making connections, don't trust people)

I wouldn't say my social life 'suffered', though I'm far more introverted than your average social animal.

I see the world as input and output, and see everyone as a potential pawn of my own manipulation. I always have plans on what to do if they every try to pull off some blackmail / whatever, but at the same time I can wear a smile and push their 'friend' buttons without any actual emotional investment :)



does you work or study suffer from you being bullied are you able to work or study normally?

Nope. Just won two academic awards this year across the school :D



If you have more information for me feel free to share, i'm just trying to get a little more insight.

I hate it when people automatically link the word 'bullying' and 'counselling'.

I mean, I'm chill with what happened and have come to terms with my own thoughts and I don't need people telling me that I need help, because I don't XD Never saw what the great fuss was... Talking to others about things like these is a waste of time IMO.

Also, I picked up martial arts two years ago and so I'm confident I can handle myself better than I did physically.



Could you also tell me if you're male or female, your age and the country you live in this would be helpfull^^

13-18 / Female / Hong Kong

Answer 2

I am a 22, almost 23 year old female from Australia, studying and also working for DHS.



*How old were you when you were bullied for the first time?

My earliest bullying experience that I can remember was when I was 6 and it was by some boys in my neighbourhood for being an Islander, I'm not sure why that is a bad thing...



*For how long were you bullied for? For how many years?

I was bullied in primary school and all the way through until I was a teenager, so for about 11-12 years.



*Do you think there was a reason you were bullied?

Mainly because I was an overweight child, born without a thyroid gland. It was sort of known that I grew up in a household below the poverty line with a dysfunctional family, however, I was mainly bullied by boys and older girls. Teachers would often give me special treatment because I missed so much school which separated me a little.



*Were those the same things that made you insecure?

I was very self-concious about my weight problem and I developed a habit of constantly telling elaborate lies about who family members were and what sort of family I came from and the places I went and things I owned. I felt very stupid all the time so I would refrain from sharing opinions in the classroom.



*Did the bullying change your personality?

I have lost weight and am relatively thin now but I am still negative and very self-conscious about my image and obsessed with superficial things, like furniture, clothing, jewellry, etc. I don't like to be percieved as poor, I am still insecure about the way I speak so I tend to over-pronounce words. I have moved out and am studying for my degree but small mistakes such as misusing a word or not knowing something will give me anxiety all day.



*Are you still experiencing problems from bullying?

I can be either too aggressive at times or too timid, never in between. I take things to heart very easily but over the years I have developed somewhat of a backbone with the help of my job and course and both personal and work experience.



*Does your social life suffer because of you being bullied when you were a child?

I became fascinated with school friend's families and houses growing up and would panic if my friends asked to come over and I still don't like them to come over out of habit, even though I live alone in an apartment. I am pessimistic when meeting new people, though I have two close friends, but making friends at work or uni is kind of hard, I don't know when someone is inviting me out or if they are being serious when they make plans with me so it never happens.



*Does your work or study suffer from you being bullied? Are you able to work or study normally?

I can always study and do my job, they are basically my life for now.



As someone who used to be overweight and unattractive and then lost weight, I find it hard to recognize whether someone is being genuine with me or not. Questions like "would they be this nice if I were still fat?" and "do they like me for who I am?" constantly pop into my head when I am socializing.

Answer 3

Are you kidding? What makes you think teachers are not just overgrown bullies themselves? I have indeed witnessed it on many occasions and that is why I am always a HUGE presence in the schools and watching my children (and their teacher) like a hawk. I got one teacher suspended in grade 2 (well, she "left" actually) and made my dislike of the grade 1 teacher known as well, who started this pattern of abuse with my child (who turned out to be GIFTED and they were simply ill equipped to deal with him). How is a CHILD supposed to compete with an adult in authority? My child's current teacher makes all the kids do PUSH UPS like some sort of retarded wanna-be drill sargeant or something and he even went so far to threaten my son that if he didn't catch up on his homework (my son attends gifted at another school one day a week and they are not supposed to make him make up ANY work that he misses on that day!!!) that he had the "power" to remove him from the gifted class....which he does NOT. So I told my son he has NO SUCH power and that he was just asserting his authority, and to ignore him and that some teachers really are just bullies and not to get on their bad side, to just "bite it" do their work and keep a low profile. My son is a brilliant, sensitive, fun loving student who tries to help others (attributes they've learned in boy scout and at camp etc.) and I'm sure that it's THAT independece and confidence that often gets him into trouble in class. It's hard for him to just keep a low profile and focus on himself and ignore everyone else as it's not in his nature, so it gets him in trouble. He gets to be "himself" in gifted, where they are encourage to problem solve as a team with other kids and really stretch themselves and their potential. So YES, teachers can be bullies. I understand they have a tough job but really, some are just more focuses on their own issues and problems and not on the students, and some bring their personal problems to school and take it out on the students, and SOME just plainly should never have become teachers because they have no people skills and are miserable SOBS. We know that's true. A teacher should be MANY things to motivate and inspire students, and sadly many fall short of the mark. I guess I set high standards but then again, my children need high standards to exceed and it's MY tax dollars that pay for their education too.